"Our live-in Nanny is a life-saver" and other things that make me want to punch you in the face

A few days ago, I spent the morning volunteering at the soup kitchen and was blessed with the company of the wives of a few of my coworkers. Considering that I was holding a chef's knife a majority of the time, it's a miracle the only blood shed was my own (I seriously cut myself every time I use a knife, this is why I would make a terrible slasher; not that I've seriously considered it as a career.)

The top 5 comments that made me want to 'go all Mike Tyson' on their asses:

Source: google.com  

1. Our new live-in Nanny has been a life-save, she takes care of the kids, laundry, and dinner. Now I have my days free to go to the gym and get some shopping done. ~ Wife A
2. That's a cute shirt, where'd you get it {me: Forever 21}oh, I went in there once but it was just too much, all those cheap clothes...[trails off to a shudder] ~ Wife B
3. We had to donate $20,000 to get {daughter's name}off the waiting list at {insert elite name here} ~ Wife A
4. We just got back from 3 weeks in the Bahamas, we were going to stay another week but the kids got bored ~ Wife B after Wife C commented on her tan
5. I wish I could pull off the "I-don't-care-how-I-look" look as well as you ~ Wife A for the win!

And here's what I've got to say about that: 

• If you're able to stay home with your kids, I think that's awesome but realize that not all of us can and when you add to that the fact that you have full-time help while you're "staying home" with your kids - well that's just like a kick in the face to those of us who suffer mommy-guilt every day on our way to work.
• I do care how I look{at least on weekdays}is my hair usually a messy nest of curls and waves, yes. But that's what nature gave me and I at least try to reign it in and make myself presentable and Molly McMoneybags comes and says "you look like crap but at least you're ok with it"...Why is it that women are still throwing back-handed compliments at each other like daggers? When did the saying get changed to "If you want to say something mean, make it sound nice"?